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From Yo-Yo Dieting to Self-Care

This is a Process, NOT a Program

An excerpt from Don't Weight :

So, you want to eat healthy and get moving.  You need to know what to do to accomplish this goal.  There must be some program that will work for you.  You have tried a hundred different food plans, diets, or nutritional programs.  You have joined the gym or spa, paid your annual membership, then dropped out within a few weeks.  What is going on?  Where is the program that will finally work? 

There is no program that will work.  You will not find it at a seminar.  It is not in a stack of audio-tapes.  It is not even here in this book.  There is no program that can tell you what to do to build your own healthy lifestyle.  There is no external source for you to find what you need. 

Don’t worry, there is hope.  The hope is inside of you.  Learning to really listen to yourself and pay attention to what you need is the key.  Yes, you can get good ideas from various programs.  However, it is up to you to keep the ideas that are helpful and leave the ones that don’t work for you.  This is your own individual process, not a program. 

This is Health for ALL Sizes
that you CAN enjoy for the rest of your life.

Instead of following any one program, you will go through a process that is unique to you alone.  In this book you will find tools, attitudes, motivations, behaviors, and skills to try out.  You will also find encouragement for you to follow your own individual process.

How can you make use of all the wonderful information available on healthy living and not feel like you are participating in another “program”?  Change the WAY you look at the experts.  When you participate in a self-help group, take a fitness class, talk to a therapist, read a book on nutrition, watch a talk show, hear a news story, or see an infomercial, remember one fact:  They may be experts in their fields, but there is only one real expert on the subject of you.  That expert is YOU! 

Teachers, instructors, counselors are consultants that you hire in order to get ideas and information.  Books, talk shows, and seminars are places you look for information.  You are in charge of trying out the new things that you have learned and deciding if they work for you.  Every exercise, whether it is physical, emotional, or intellectual, is just an opportunity to experiment and see what effect it has on you.  Tune in to yourself.  How does it feel?  Does it seem useful?  Does it cause a problem?  You decide.  You are the expert on you.

There is nobody on earth who has the same needs as you do.  There is nobody who knows you better than you know yourself.  So, logically, you should be the one that you depend on as you go through the process of building your own healthy lifestyle. 

In this book you will see some new ways of thinking about old problems.  You can try out new behaviors.  You can experiment with new motivations.  This is a living, changing process, not just a program that you follow. Nobody else will travel exactly the same road that you will.

Most of the time, when people think of “eating plans”, they think of a program that defines what to eat, portion size, when to eat, and other requirements of the program.  By definition, a program has requirements and parameters that are set by some expert.  Those who follow a program are supposed to learn the rules of the program and incorporate those rules into daily life.  On any given day, you are either “on the program”, or “off the program”.  You are either doing what the expert has told you to do, or you are not.  When following a program, you always have a measuring stick available to tell how you are doing.  The problem is, this measuring stick is usually used to criticize yourself and damage your self-esteem. 

I do not offer a "program" for healthy eating and fun fitness.  Instead, I offer a set of choices, tools, exercises, and insights.  I propose or recommend new ways of looking at things and different actions to take.  Each person will try these options in a different order and for a different length of time.  Each person will select what works for them and what does not.  No two people will choose the same path.  This is your process for individual change.  Your process will be unique.  You have a very qualified expert to help you make the best choices … that expert is you.

Keep an open mind as you choose your focus for each week.  It is valuable to write down your goals.  Writing goals is not a tool to force yourself to do something.  It is a tool to increase your awareness of your ever-changing goals.  You will not make a vow to achieve a specific goal no matter what.  Instead you will keep adjusting your goals until they are just right for you and your life. 

Sometimes you will do just as you planned.  Sometimes you will not do as you had intended.  That does not mean you failed.  That means you have something to learn.  IT IS AN OPPORTUNITY TO FIGURE OUT WHAT YOU NEED.  Was the goal more complicated than you had originally thought?  Do you need to do something else before you can accomplish your original goal?  If so, then you need to change your goal to reflect the new information.

I encourage you to select some action to take EACH WEEK that will affect your feelings, your fitness, and your healthy eating.  Please only choose one small doable action or focus in each area.  (If you try to do too many things, you will be overwhelmed.)  When you write down your intentions at the beginning of each week, you will have something to reflect on at the end of each week.  You will have the benefit of hindsight as you look back and compare your intentions with your real life.  Did you do as you intended?  What helped?  What got in the way?  Was there something you needed to do first, before you could accomplish your goal?  How can you set yourself up to achieve your goals next week? 

Keep thinking.

Continue to be creative and try out new choices. 

Set your goals and keep improving on the goals that you set. 


Listen to yourself, the real expert on you.

You cannot go "off program" because you are not on a program.

You are enjoying SELF-CARE!


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By Kelly Bliss M.Ed., A.C.E. author of Don’t Weight, Eat Healthy & Get Moving NOW!
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