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> Back to Self-Care Excerpts List

Self-Care Excerpt from Don't Weight

I Wonder

We all talk to ourselves in our heads and out loud. The way you talk to yourself is very important. Every time you repeat a negative thought, you make it more likely to be true. For example, The more often you repeat, "I can't think of a title for my book", the more likely it will be that you will not be able to think of a title. When you change the way you talk to yourself and say, "I wonder what title I will discover for my book", you have left your mind open for the positive to surface and be recognized. Using phrasing that starts with "I wonder" is an important skill.

  • Instead of: "I can't do that", try saying: "I wonder what will help me to do that."
  • Instead of: "I don't know what I really want in life", try saying: "I wonder what I really want in life"
  • Instead of: "I can't tell how I feel", try saying: "I wonder how I feel"
  • Instead of: "I never finish anything", try saying: "I wonder what will help me finish this"

Wondering is wonderful! "I wonder" leaves your mind open to ideas that may help solve the problem. As you write in "Your Own Book" you will have plenty of opportunities to practice this powerful rephrasing. Does this sound like a useful exercise to you? If it does, you may choose to write about your experience with this exercise in "Your Own Book". Think about the way you think.

As you become aware of how often you talk to yourself in negative ways, you may be surprised at how frequently you do it. You may begin to feel bad for being so negative so often. Remember, you were taught to use these negative phrases. And, you can LEARN to use more helpful phrases. I encourage you to notice your negative thinking ... and be happy every time you are aware of a negative thought or phrase. Every time you notice a negative thought, YOU HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO CHANGE THE WAY YOU THINK. Your increased awareness is the key to changing and improving your life. This opportunity for improvement is part of your road to success.

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By Kelly Bliss M.Ed., A.C.E. author of Don’t Weight, Eat Healthy & Get Moving NOW!
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