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> Back to Self-Care Excerpts List

Self-Care Excerpt from Don't Weight

"With Bliss" is What Matters

I call the process that I teach "Healthy Living with Bliss(tm)". The most important aspect of this concept is "with bliss". If it is not blissful, then you won't continue to do it for a lifetime.

There are those who believe that all motivation can be summed up in two basic categories: pain and pleasure. Pain is a powerful short-term motivator. Pain simply does not work as a long-term motivator. It is depressing and exhausting. Anyone who has suffered the pain of living large in a small world knows this is true. Anyone who has suffered the pain of an eating disorder knows this is true. Pleasure is a great long-term motivator. When you make changes in your life with pleasure, joy, and bliss as your motivator, you can continue those changes for a lifetime.

Positive motivation is self-sustaining.

In order to be successful with your healthy lifestyle choices, those choices must be pleasurable, comfortable, and enjoyable. Indeed, in order to last a lifetime, choices must be blissful.

In this section I would like to give some concrete examples of what it would be like to cope with eating and exercise issues in this new blissful way. I am going to describe a fictitious day in the life of a fictitious woman. Let's call her Mary. In this day, Mary will encounter all sorts of situations around food and fitness. She will demonstrate the process of healthy eating and fitness with bliss. Mary demonstrates making choices, and working through old thought patterns/feelings. You have read the concepts, now let's see some concrete examples of these concepts in use. Mary faces many of the same situations you face. Perhaps she faces more in a day than you do, perhaps less. She copes with these situations without deprivation, without pressuring, and without guilt. Her motivation is pleasure centered. She actually avoids negative motivation because she knows it is short-term and may cause problems. She makes her life choices with bliss.

Yes, this is a fictitious day, an ideal day. This day is has more choices and more experiences in it than an average day. This day seems longer because I am giving many examples of many choices. I tell you about this day to demonstrate these healthy living concepts in context of daily life. All these events don't happen on one day in a real life. Mary would not always cope as well as she does on this ideal day. I am telling you about this fictitious day for a purpose.

As you watch Mary go through her day, you may see thought processes and choices that would be helpful in your life. Good. You can take steps to add these helpful options to your own life. As you watch Mary go through her day, you may see things that don't apply to you. Fine. Toss those ideas aside and keep looking for helpful ideas. You are in charge of keeping what you find useful and tossing what doesn't work for you. As you watch Mary go through her fictitious day, you decide what is right for you.

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By Kelly Bliss M.Ed., A.C.E. author of Don’t Weight, Eat Healthy & Get Moving NOW!
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